Infant Dog Gives Up On Life, Attempts Suicide

July 28, 11:30pm. New family dog swallows nectarine pit.

11:35pm. Google: nectarine pits poisonous. Also un-poopable to 5-pound puppy.

11:55am. ER Vet. Pit seen in stomach x-ray. And a staple.

July 29, 12:30am. Surgery discussed. Barf-inducer administered.

2:00am. Puppy barfs. Pit expelled. Relief and high-fives all around. Puppy licks mom’s face with vomit-breath tongue. Mom thinks, we should’ve adopted a gecko.

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2 responses to “Infant Dog Gives Up On Life, Attempts Suicide

  1. But what is the Michael Jackson angle on this story?

  2. Aaaaaaaaagh!

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